I was thinking today about a comment my son made recently. He said that since I was both Mom and Dad (a name he combined as either Dom or Mad -- depending on the day), he felt that he should probably have gotten me a Father's Day present. I was thrilled that he recognized that I was doing the work of two parents (not everyone gets that).
Sometimes I think it would be nice to have a partner -- to not have to do this alone. I was thinking about this a few weeks ago when I spent a nice, long weekend with my sibs and my parents. All are married and all have wonderful partners. Two things came to mind -- I have never really had a partner, even when I was married. I did the lion's share in my marriage. So I don't really know what a true partnership would look like for me. AND (because I tend to like to do things my own way) there actually are aspects of being a single parent that I like: making my own financial decisions (deciding how to spend and save my money), making my own decisions about maintaining my house or raising my kids. (Was that a case of the grass appearing greener?)
I was emphatically reminded during that weekend -- when I was feeling a bit sorry for myself -- that I have a nice life. And I wholeheartedly agree -- but single parenting is not for wimps. Sometimes (many times) it is exhausting and hard (granted not as hard as raising four boys on a nurse's salary...) -- and based on how well my kids are doing (people comment on what good kids they are) -- totally worth it.
posted by Terri @ 4:14 PM
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